He is in control, not me or anyone else. (Anyone else need to hear that this Christmas season?!)
It was a very, very special day to get to watch firsthand as Jeremy baptized Grace.
I wanted to record some of my thoughts from the day she made her decision.
December 2, 2014
Today I received a call from a teacher at school outlining some trouble Grace was having at school getting along with other students...again. It has plagued this school year. My opinionated firstborn is struggling socially to make and keep friends in her everything is black and white world. She doesn't know grey, or compromise very well.
This particular case was just down right parenting embarrassment. I started at my whit's end but thankfully God in his grace didn't leave me there.
I discussed the situation and Grace had little repentance on her part. She really felt she had the right to express her distaste towards other student's actions and attitudes. AGH! I shared with her that I wasn't exactly sure what to do with her. We model love & forgiveness in our home, we have taught her to be kind and that there are consequences when we are unkind, we give her boundaries and consequences. I reminded her that her problem was SIN, and asked her if she knew what the solution was.
She was quick to tell me that only salvation brings a solution to a sin problem. She reminded me that for over a year she had been asking questions and insisting she wanted to become a Christian and that we consider her being baptized. Can I just be honest? Leading our daughter to Christ has been one of the hardest things we've ever done! We just wanted to make sure she was ready and felt like she was making her own decision. We have wrestled and wrestled and sought wisdom and wrestled some more. (Its so true you learn on the first one!)
So we revisited some biblical truths we had talked about the last time we were caught in a struggle. I had clearly shared the gospel with her and asked where she was at in the fall. For the first time since she has started insisting she responded with uncertainty and so I had let it be. Today the Lord gave me the wisdom to ask exactly what was holding her back. She shared with me she was afraid of getting up in front of the entire church. And then the Holy Spirit took over.
I shared with her a verse from Ephesians that God brought to mind about how we are to bear with one another in love.
"As a prisoner for the Lord, then, I urge you to live a life worthy of the calling you have received. Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love. Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace."
We had been talking over and over and over again about being a peacemaker at school.
But that wasn't what caught her in the verse. We talked bout what it meant to be a prisoner of the Lord. Then we talked about who/what we are a prisoner to before we belong to the Lord. She identified that she was a slave to sin, and she wanted freedom. And she knew who could bring that freedom. She identified she was ready for God to be boss! (a big deal for her) As I prayed with her I had a total peace that this was the moment of clarity we'd both been searching for.
As soon as she spoke those precious words of accepting Jesus and said amen she ran to get a paper and pencil. She forced me to sit down and right down everything she wanted to say so she could copy it with the correct spelling (who is this child who cares about spelling?!) She still had consequences to face for her misbehavior but she was a different child. She was so full of joy. She picked out a fancy dress to wear to school the next day to share her big news!
God also started working on her fearful heart. Soon she came to me with a realization. There were so many people at church who have taught her and were excited for her baptism. She bravely made the choice all on her own to do it during church. She wasn't fearful at all! She bravely declared every word.
I posted the video above but here is her testimony word for word in written format:
Today I became a Christian.
I decided to become a Christian because when I was at school I felt yucky, and had problems. I felt under arrest by my sin. I talked to my mom and read a Bible verse, Ephesians 4:1-3. It was about being a peacemaker. I had sin in my life. I prayed with my mom and admitted my sin. I asked for the gift of the Holy Spirit. Now Jesus is my Savior and my Lord. He is in control, not me or anyone else. When we were done I didn't feel yucky. I felt good inside. I felt the Holy Spirit. I want to be baptized and live a life where God is in charge. I made this choice, and Jesus saved me.
