For the Love of Overpriced Blueberries

Recently one of my dear friends spoke some good truth to me. We were chatting about a crazy status update she had shared about a day in the life of her motherhood. You know the kind. The one where this happens. And this happens. And then this breaks. And then this person pukes. And you just have to share so everyone can give you some solidarity sister.

I had one of those days the other day when I was doing an errand marathon trying to get ready for two of my children's birthday parties.

You know what I mean. We'd been to the bank. And Dollar General. And Wal-Mart. And then Aldi.  And it was bordering on 1:30 and no one had eaten a bit of lunch but I felt the need to power through.

I have said the following statement more times than I can count.

"I will no longer go grocery shopping with both boys."

(Thing 1 & Thing 2)

And yet "like a dog to its vomit" (Ew? What a gross Bible verse right?) I end up in a pinch and there I am crying for mercy as I drive home from said shopping experience sans 4 year old number one and 4 year old number two shoving lime tortilla chips in my face and calling it lunch.

(Don't worry I shared with Thing 1 and Thing 2)

On this particular trip I of course had a list of "must have" items as I was trying to party plan. Which means I was trying to juggle keeping the boys from destroying the store and checking everything off my list.

Yes, I know this is a recipe for a disaster. But, it is also the great material for this blogpost. So at least my mistake wasn't wasted, right?

Towards the middle of aisle 3 I realized there was a package of blueberries in our cart.

What? Where did those come from?

I only buy the produce on sale. It makes our budget work. I knew I hadn't chosen these lovely blueberries because they weren't on sale that week.

I'm pretty sure that was the work of precious (and apparently hungry) Thing 2.

At this point we had already made it to the check out line so I decided to go with it and silently offered up a prayer that said not-on-sale blueberries would be under $3.

And with that we began the daunting task of unloading our fairly full cart. With expert help of course from Thing 1 and Thing 2. About half way through I hear the following, "Oh, no! Mama the blueberries are falling."

You guessed it the overpriced not on sale blueberries had mysteriously (Or not so mysteriously since my helpers were hungry) come open and were spilling out into the cart and through the holes of the cart onto the floor. Everywhere. So, I did what any frugal mama would do and I started picking them up and putting them back in the carton.

Off the grocery store floor. (Calm down they came out of a field and I did intend to wash them.)

While the boys started "helping" by trying to move the cart a.k.a. smash a bunch of blueberries.

I finally picked up all the blueberries including the precious smashed ones that I sadly threw away. While putting the carton onto the conveyor I might or might not have said for everyone around to hear, "God is going to develop the patience of a Saint in me by the time I get you boys raised."

I wish this was the end of the story.

We arrive at our car and I am silently praising God that we have made it to the finish line and I can buckle the boys in their car seats while I unload the groceries into our van in silent freezing peace.

That is when Thing 1 looks up at me and says the following.

"Mama I put my yogurt in my pocket. And you forgot to pay for it."

Have mercy.

At which time we returned to the warmth of the Aldi (or was that my blood pressure providing the heat?) to pay for the $.44 yogurt.

Take 2 on the finish line. I buckle the boys into their car seat and actually arrive at the peace and quiet of loading our groceries into the back of the van. Only to realize that the star of this story the BLUEBERRIES have made a reappearance. They have apparently came open AGAIN and have left a trail all over the parking lot.

Now I know you are wondering two things.

1- Did I pick them up? No, even I have a limit in frugality/patience.

2-How much did they cost? Praise the Lord they were indeed under $3. I believe I paid $2.38 for the less than 1/2 a carton that made it to our house.

But Thing 1 & Thing 2 did enjoy them, and I am pretty sure I remembered to wash them.
(Breathe....I washed them.)

And if I'm being honest more of my days look like this than I'd like to admit. And though they make me laugh now, at the time I thought I might not survive. (I can be dramatic) Or at least not with my patient mama facade in place for sure!

But here is the great truth my friend shared while we were talking about her own adventurous shopping trip with littles.

She said, "But really couldn't most moms of little ones make a status update like that every day? That is just kind of life with kids."

I needed to hear that because I sometimes believe the lie that only my life is a running source of material for Mom's Night Out 2. I think other mom's lives are much more chaos free. But I'm guessing so many moms wouldn't have loved the first movie if they couldn't relate.

Maybe I'm not the only mom who has caved and paid for over-priced half gone blueberries.

I recently finished a Bible study by Kelly Minter. This quote felt like it was penned just for me. For my motherhood. For my ministry. For my undone laundry and in desperate need of a mop floors.

"God shows up in our reality. He shows up in our weakness. His eyes are not running across the earth looking for the woman who lives in a  romantic movie set of perfection. He is looking for the real, the weak, and the one who conceded need for Him. And how thankful I am."

Real? Check.

Weak? Check Check.

In Need of Him. Check. Check. Check.

I guess his eyes are looking for me.

May he find me up to my eyeballs in spilled blueberries conceding my weakness and asking Him to make it my strength. (possibly while I thank him for lime tortilla ships :)

My Post Adoption Split Personality

Today I answer the BIG question people have been asking.

Will spring ever come?

Oh, wait I don't know the answer to that one. Let's try again.

Will we adopt again?

I know! That is a good one right?

The answer I have depends on the day.

Most days I look at my son and I see the miracle that God has placed in our life. A living breathing reminder of His sovereignty, His grace, His goodness. I think about the extreme transformation that has happened in David's life and I am in awe. He has adapted like the survivor that he is. He can speak fluent English. He is quickly catching up on skills like cutting, counting, and problem solving. He is hilarious. His smile lights up a room and his songs fill our ears.

He is a brother.

A son.

He is absolutely precious.

And I think how can we NOT do this again?

We have learned so much.

I mean look at us-don't we look amazingly blessed?
(Partly due to the miracle of great editing)

And I am over the moon thrilled.

This family picture is like the answer to a thousand prayers hanging on my wall.

My sister and mom took these pictures as my birthday gift this year. They are so amazing, and we are so blessed to have access to such amazing photography. (that we totally couldn't afford otherwise!)

And then my sister surprised me with a huge canvas for my Christmas gift. Its really big. But it just seems so fitting and perfect. Because having David home and in our family is a HUGE deal. A miracle we weren't even sure was possible.

So why the split personality?

Because these feelings of awe are the way I feel most days on a good week.

But lets be honest we have our days.

Days like today when said miracle dumps half a bottle of cologne on his head when using the bathroom.

When he writes all over the hard wood floors with permanent marker while your trying to fix big sister's hair for her concert that you can't go to because another sister has pink eye in both eyes and the hubs in working the late shift.

(Thank the Lord for magic erasers, a Gramy who can go to concerts and modern medicine. Can I get a mama amen out there?!)

When half the bath water (remember the cologne) is flooding your bathroom while you are trying to read with the sister with pink eye.

And it reeks of cologne. And your floor is covered in pieces of a disintegrating magic eraser from its popular use as of late. And your bathroom is flooded. And your husband is working hard and you are sending up the desperate prayers. And this day is so far from the one you planned on having.

And all I can think is how in the world do people do this more than once? How do they have a precious brood of grafted in little ones without their house falling apart?

And then Satan begins to spin the lies. Its just you. You aren't enough. Your home is chaotic. Your kids are crazy. You aren't worthy of the ones you have let alone the ones you still may want.

And here I sit with my post adoption split personality.

Because I'm finding again that motherhood, all motherhood, is about giving it up and letting it go.

And with each child we've added to our family I've had to let go. Let go of my pre-pregnancy body, of my uninterrupted night's sleep, of going to the bathroom by myself, of organized toys, of puzzles with all the pieces, of daughter's with fixed hair, and sons with shoes on the right feet, of holding it all together and of worrying about what other people think when I definitely don't hold it all together.

(Well, I'm trying on that last one. I thought that was supposed to come with your 30's but I'm a late bloomer so maybe by 40 I'll finally give the people pleasing a rest.)

So remember the huge canvas of our family photo? Up until this week it was still sitting in its protective cardboard box.

Because as you can tell from the above description of our day pretty things need protection around here.  And because truth be told I just couldn't find a spot on my wall where it fit.

(Yeah, its the end of February and we are just now finding places for all our Christmas gifts. Your judging. I'm trying not to care, remember?)

Until this week. I found the perfect spot. My little white box. Remember this?

It was still hanging on my wall untouched. Because I kind of get attached to photos on my wall of my babies when they were little and I hate to update them.

But, I knew this was the perfect spot.

And it was.

Because I had to let go of the old to find room for the new.

And for me so much of motherhood is learning to let it go and being willing to let God redefine.

So in a few years will I be taking this photo down to hang a new one of the Humiston family seven strong with more than one little set of dark eyes?

I have no idea.

I know that mothering this crazy crew has left me sobbing on the floor of my bedroom in the middle of the night while my husband sleeps. Begging God to make me see. See the truth that he has ordained me to be their mama and he didn't make a mistake despite the marker on the floor, and the dents in the drywall, and the repenting again and again for harsh words spoken in exasperation instead of love.

But I'm no longer just desperate for an orderly life.

I've become more desperate for the Holy Spirit to develop His fruit in me than any other thing I've ever done. And I wouldn't trade that or my four precious kiddos for anything.

This quote from a blogpost of an adoptive mama pretty much sums up my feelings on the question at hand.

"I'm not going to say our family feels "complete" now. Our family feels FULL but our commitment to going where God leads remains...and it may lead to creating more space in our home and our hearts for kids who need it."

And I know that isn't really an answer, but its my heart.

He Sets The Lonely in Families

In April of 2012 my feet touched down on West African soil for the first time. I thought I was there to do a VBS for missionary kids. And I was. And it has changed my life. 

I also went to an orphanage for the first time...and met my SON (although I didn't know he would be my son at the time!) 

But he wasn't the only kiddo that caught my heart's attention. 

I also met a sweet little girl named Dorcas. 

Today I'd like to introduce you to her. 

Look how little she was the first time I met her?!

April 2012

April 2013

2014/2015

Eating pizza!

Trying a hamburger.

Fun at the swimming pool.

Pete & Amy Riley

Dorcas is determined. I've seen her with the help of her friends at the orphanage ride a tricycle.

Dorcas is a beautiful child of God. Her smile literally lights up the room.

Dorcas is an overcomer. She has been "diagnosed" with CP. However, she doesn't let that stop her too much. Since we met her she has received a walker and learned to get around very well with it. Recently, through the help of therapy (done by an amazing volunteer missionary) she has began to learn to walk unaided. We can't imagine what she could do with professional focused therapy!

 Dorcas loves to be loved.

Dorcas needs a family.

I have to confess I put off writing this post. I am a detail person. I wanted the perfect set of pictures and description of what her skills are and her prognosis is. I wasn't sure exactly how to advocate for this precious girl. So this year our family began praying on a daily basis for Dorcas to find a family. And the Lord has burdening my heart like crazy. And so I write. Do I have all the "answers" to what life with Dorcas will look like for a family? No. But, I am confident her forever family is out there. 

Could it be you? Could it be a friend of yours who has a heart for children with special needs? Your friends who have been looking to adopt an older child? 

Dorcas is currently living in an orphanage setting. She has the amazing blessing of a missionary family (The Rileys) who are investing in her while she waits for you. They are paving the way for her to have a family by taking her swimming (fun therapy), doings exercises, exposing her to American food, taking her places outside the orphanage walls, and pouring love and affection on her. (and photographing/videoing it all for you to have!)

But, this is not a forever family. It breaks my heart that she has been waiting this long. What have I been so busy doing that I haven't written this post before? Why did I think I had to have advocacy all figured out before I began? No more.

The Lord has challenged me to do more. I am starting a fund for Dorcas. Many of you know my cupcake business Sweet 2 the Soul began as a way to bring David home. I have continued to bake and give half of everything I make to missions. For the next six months half of everything I make will go into a fund for Dorcas' future family towards their adoption expenses. 

If you'd like to hear more about what an amazing little girl Dorcas is and what day to day life with her might look like I'd be happy to put you in touch with Amy Riley. If you have questions about how to adopt from her country we've done it and would be happy to help you on that end. 

What can YOU do?

-Pray and ask God if you could be the family God has been waiting for to step out in faith and adopt Dorcas. If you are certain that isn't you then please begin praying for her forever family to be found.

-Share this post with your prayer warrior friends, your heart for adoption friends, your special needs friends. 

-Give. If God leads you to be a part of this little girl's journey I'd be happy to add your contribution to her adoption fund. You can Paypal the funds to hummy25@hotmail.com. 

Or checks can be sent to:

515 Euclid Ave

Hannibal, MO 63401

We will make sure they get to her.

I can be contacted at jenniferhumiston@hotmail.com or through Facebook. 

"God sets the lonely in families." Psalm 68:6 Will you pray this promise for Dorcas right now?