This is the devotional book we are using for our breakfast devotion time. Faith calls it her little pink "Bible." A while back we were reading from Numbers 9:15-23.On the day the Holy Tent was set up, a cloud covered it. (The Holy Tent was also called the Tent of the Agreement.) From dusk until dawn the cloud above the Tent looked like fire. The cloud stayed above the Tent. At night it looked like fire. when the cloud moved from its place over the Tent, the Israelites moved. Wherever the cloud stopped, the Israelites camped. So the Israelites moved at the Lord's command. While the cloud stayed over the Tent, they stayed in place. Sometimes the cloud stayed over the Tent for a long time. The Israelites obeyed the Lord and did not move. Sometimes the cloud was over it only a few days. At the Lord's command they moved. Sometimes the cloud stayed only from dusk until dawn. When the cloud lifted the next morning, the people moved. When the cloud lifted, day or night, the people moved. The cloud might stay over the Tent for two days, a month or a year. As long as it stayed, the people would camp. But when the cloud lifted, they moved. At the Lord's command the people camped. And at his command they moved. They obeyed the Lord's order that he commanded through Moses.
This passage caught my attention and resonated with my heart.
I felt like these words were cut and pasted out of our current life circumstances...
The cloud might stay over the Tent for two days, a month or a year. As long as it stayed, the people would camp. But when the cloud lifted, they moved. At the Lord's command the people camped. And at his command they moved.
Now granted we don't live in a tent. No, we live in a very nice super comfy American home. But, as we have been seeking the Lord's vision and purpose for our family we have been living in a sort of "we might be moving" limbo land for almost a year and a half. And to be honest, it is the best of times and the worst of times all wrapped into one. On the one hand God has immeasurably blessed and redeemed "Hannibal" as we have waited. I have also come to learn that the "permanence" we often assume/rely on in our lives is a false sense of security. But, it can also be challenging. We find ourselves saying, "But what if we're moving..." when trying to make financial decisions, as we prepare for Grace going to kindergarten, as we grow deeper relationships with new friends and attempt to prepare for an adoption. So often we come to a place where we think it would be SO much easier to make a decision if we knew where this path would end up...
Boy, do I wish we had a pillar of cloud & fire over our house. (Wouldn't that be cool?)
Yet each time we wait God has always given just enough grace & wisdom for us to know the next step (maybe I should say baby step). He's been faithful to give clear direction even when that has been in the form of a no. No, we didn't end up getting an interview. No, that position is no longer available we just offered it to someone yesterday...No, you aren't eligible to begin the adoption process this year you will need to wait. And so we wait, and pray, and seek and sometimes try to convince God he really needs to have this all worked out by the fall when Grace will start kindergarten. (I'm not sure he is near as worried about this fact as I am :)
Looking back at the Scripture I see the following:
1. Sometimes the Israelites stayed (for 2 days, a month, years)
2. Sometimes the Israelites moved. (after only a few days)
3. The people were ready. (day or night they moved)
4. They were directed by the Lord's command and they obeyed.
Well I've got one and two down. And I think I'm the closest to three I've been in my whole life. But, four well I think I will be working on that one my whole life. Total obedience is hard. I know the Israelites knew that! But, I also know its a worthy goal. I'm still working on figuring out the difference between when God is planting you and when He is preparing you. (And I'm still willing to install the pillar thing if God is interested...)
