Well, it has been a very long week. This time last week I was coming home from youth group exhausted and not feeling well. Over the weekend we had a retreat and I had been hosting six Jr. High girls at our house. So I had been busy cooking and staying up way later than normal. I was feeling sorry for myself thinking before I had children this would have been when I crawled into bed and didn't reaapear until I felt better. I was up most of Sunday night with stomach issues (I keep having 24 hour flu bugs-which are more likely some type of stomach problem I have yet to get diagnosed). So I woke up Monday morning not sure if I thought Jeremy should go into work because I felt pretty terrible.
Like I said I was feeling pretty sorry for myself that being sick when you are a mom is a real bummer. And then the totally unexpected happened. Jeremy walked in and said, "Jennifer, your grandpa died this morning." Not what I was expecting for sure. And so instead of staying in bed I felt like the Lord said- Nope, you aren't going to stay in bed instead you are going to run a marathon.
So I packed up my girls and headed home. Hoping to help out in any way I could. It was a very long week. On top of everything else my girls both came down with colds. I wish I could say I took it all in stride but I didn't. I struggled. I was tired. I felt guilty for the lack of superb care my girls were not getting. I was even grouchy with my husband. But it was worth it because I felt like I was able to help out a little. I helped organize the plants our family received so they could be well cared for by family members. My girls brought moments of laughter in the midst of tears for my grandma. But the best part was I learned more about my granparents.
I learned about how my grandpa was part of the local State Park being established. I learned about all the different church committees he had served on. I chated with my grandma about how it was having all four boys at home when they were little. She said she made them take naps & go to bed early, sometimes for her own sanity (Sounds just like me!)
Probably the hardest part was speaking at the funeral. My cousin Sarah and I were asked to speak, representing the grandchildren. Thankfully, laying in bed very early one morning the Lord brought to mind a Psalm I had been studying not too long ago. And so we did a reading based around the 128th Psalm.
I have found there is a temptation with this blog to make it like a Christmas card (only highlighting the wonderful sweet moments-making our family look seemingly perfect) But that isn't my life and I doubt it is yours either. This week was hard and I didn't always represent the Jesus I love-but I did learn a lot.
